All I can say is: titles and theme tune shit, everything else fucking awesome. Matt Smith is so good that I forget that he has a head the size of most normal people’s entire body. He presents a nice, eclectic mix of a number of doctors, most notably Two, Four, Nine and Ten. And young Tottie McFitPiece as Amy Pond (come on, admit it, you can’t remember her name either, and companions are only there for the teenage and maybe slightly older than teenage attention spans) played a blinder as a companion with the brass to stand up to the Doctor when needed.

It looked great – a side bonus of filming in HD is that SD looks much better – and Murray Gold’s music was spot on as always. Well, apart from the gag-reflex inducing theme, which is just shameful (it’s actually worse than the music they put on the Doctor Who Confidential programmes). 

So anyway, enough bollocks, as I appear to be enacting the comic strip in real life now. Best you stop reading this and check out this week’s wibbly wobbly, timey-wimey strip right here. 

What a clusterfuck.

Anyway, upshot is that now there is too little time to draw a full strip to replace it (I refuse to draw the same strip again, that’s too mind-numbing).

So tune in, calibrate yourself and check your vertical hold with the hastily-concocted replacement right here.

Now, it seems, Old Spice has had somewhat of a renaissance. And a funny one at that. Catch the adverts after the jump. Facebook readers, as ever, click here to see the videos.

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Filed under: silly fun stuff, TV Tagged: advertising, after shave, comedy, man, manliness, Old Spice, scent ]]> http://blog.dogsounds.com/2010/02/09/im-on-a-horse/feed/ 0 dogsounds Old Spice, advertising, comedy, manliness http://blog.dogsounds.com/2010/02/04/sand-animations-by-kseniya-simonova/ http://blog.dogsounds.com/2010/02/04/sand-animations-by-kseniya-simonova/#comments Thu, 04 Feb 2010 16:05:52 +0000 mart http://blog.dogsounds.com/?p=2322 ]]> Kseniya Simonova is a Ukranian artist. Using a giant light box and music, she paints animated stories in sand recounting the invasion and occupation of Ukraine during WWII. She won Ukraine’s Got Talent 2009. Singing jackasses need not apply.

The story starts with a couple on a park bench, followed by the chaotic invasion, morphing into an old widow and a memorial for unknown soldiers, ending with remembrance that “you are always near”. Turn up the volume and watch this captivating sequence full-screen:

(Facebook readers click here for the full video)

New! Britains Ugliest Dumb Child! Phone in and vote for your favorite!

Every time you turn the damn thing on it is some pointless, no-brain-required phone-in votey type bullshit that has absolutely no value whatsoever, and is annoyingly followed by 80% of the brain-dead population who probably couldn’t even spell “anathema”.

However, what I do like to do is watch those programmes that I enjoy on BBC’s iPlayer. I refuse to use the other players from the other channels. ITV’s is a pile of utter wank that seems to only have soaps and celebrity phone-in nonsense (Britan’s Hardest Street Gangs vs. Chopper Coppers Buying Houses To Do Up, On Ice!! Phone in and vote for your favorite!) and pretty much  nothing that may have been on in the last few days (kind of missing the point of a ‘catch-up’ service there, ITV). Channel 4′s 4OD service does have a few good programmes but the service and player itself is so janky and broken that I refuse to use it (oh dear, lost your stream half way through after waiting five minutes for the damn player to load up on your third attempt watching Time Team? Tough shit, sit through all the damn adverts at the start again, please. And wait whilst the player spools for a minute after you drag the slidey thing across).

So I depend on the iPlayer. It is awesome. Missed your favorite show? Then it is probably on the iPlayer straight after broadcast for 7 days. Slow connection mean you can’t stream for shit? No worries, just download it and watch it within 7 days. Fast connection? Great, enjoy the HD versions of most programmes. Connection dropped half way through? No problem, refresh the page when you are back on and it will carry on where you left off. Oh, and there are NO ADVERTS because your license paid for this stuff. Enjoy!

But you know what would be even better? Watching this stuff on my big-ass shiny LCD, with surround sound. Not my pokey litte PC screen with two dodgy speakers. And I just happen to have a games console connected to it. And games consoles are becoming the new media hubs. And you know what else? Seems good old Auntie Beeb agrees, as they provide the iPlayer to Playstation 3 owners who have the consoles connnected to their big-ass TVs. Great.

Except, yeah, it’s an Xbox 360 that I have hooked up. But now the 360 is no longer just a console, with facebook, Twitter, streaming instant-on movies, Sky TV and Last FM, we’ll be getting the iPlayer soon as well then, yeah?

Um…no. Although the BBC is mandated by its Royal Charter to provide its service by any and all current means possible, which it does, and really, really wants to let console owners access the content, they have basically told Microsoft to go fuck themselves. Maybe not exactly said that. But it was intoned.

The problem is that Microsoft want to leverage as much content on their service as they can to paid Gold Live subscribers. That’s fine, it’s their service, and the Gold subscribers pay to keep it going. No worries there. I happily pay for my Live. However, whilst this is fine, Microsoft can’t understand why the BBC are refusing to allow the iPlayer on Live.

It’s really simple, Microsoft: the BBC are not allowed to charge for streaming or broadcast of  their programming outside the Licence Fee that we all pay. It is a non-profit organisation. So there is no way in hell the BBC are going to let iPlayer be exclusive to Gold Live subscribers. This would, effectively be charging people for something that they have already paid for – with their licence fee. The only way around this would be if Microsoft purchased the broadcast rights – the BBC can charge distributors. This is how channels like Dave can broadcast on a paid service like Sky or Cable, and broadcast BBC programmes – they have bought them first.

Somehow, I don’t see Microsoft doing that any time soon. Apparently so far they are refusing to back down.

MS:   ”We want to make iPlayer exclusive to our Gold members”
BBC: “What, so people have to pay to get what they have already paid for, and can get free on the internet because they have already paid for it by default?”
MS:   “Oh yes.”
BBC:  ”Er…I don’t think so. We’re a public service.”
MS:   “But Sky do it!”
BBC: “Then Sky subscrbers are idiots if they don’t realise they are paying twice. Good day to you sir.”

So don’t hold your breath. Irony is, if Microsoft offered it to Gold and Silver subscribers BBC would be happy, and Xbox Live would be in a win-win because demand would be increased - especially for those who don’t  want to pay twice for Sky. And, who knows, getting a lot more Silver subscribers can’t be a bad thing – the other features on there may encourage them to go Gold.

Bah.

I was intrigued by this, but now, after seeing this shoddy, shoddy piece of crap, all I can think is “What, people get paid for animation this bad?”

Turn the lights off, lock the door, and go home. Nothing to see here.

(facebook readers click here to see the fucking awful video. If you must).

And, what is it with CGI animators and designers NOT BEING ABLE TO DO LAPELS, ever? Christ.

I’m pretty sure the real motiovation behind these trailers is Microsoft saying “look, see how utterly fucking awesome a Halo movie would be? Huh? Huh?”

And you know what? I utterly agree. If this is what a mere ad agency can pull off – this and the Believe campaign being even slightly better than the Neil Blomkamp/Peter Jackson shorts – then imagine what a movie studio could do.

Anyway, watch and be awed. That’s a lot of story, action and emotion in just one and a half minutes.

Facebook readers – as ever, click here for the video.

Posted in cool stuff, halo, movies, sci-fi, TV, video games, war Tagged: advertising, bungie, halo, Halo 3 ODST, live-action, microsoft, ODST, video games, videogames, We Are ODST, Xbox 360 ]]> http://blog.dogsounds.com/2009/09/06/we-are-odst/feed/ 1 dogsounds http://blog.dogsounds.com/2009/07/08/cbs-60-minutes-swine-flu-shots-scandal-1976/ http://blog.dogsounds.com/2009/07/08/cbs-60-minutes-swine-flu-shots-scandal-1976/#comments Wed, 08 Jul 2009 22:04:22 +0000 dogsounds http://dogsounds.wordpress.com/?p=1610 ]]>

The world apparently on the threshold of a Swine Flu pandemic. Millions could be at risk. No one is safe. Governments positioning themselves for mass enforced vaccination programs. Ever get that hit of “I’m sure I’ve been here before”?

You should do, at least in the U.S.

You have been here before. Except last time, one person died, a handful of unconfirmed cases were noted around the world, and the U.S. government forced millions to take enforced flu shots.  

Oh, and one other difference – that time, the CDC was fully aware that that particular strain of the vaccine had not been tested as safe for humans and could lead to severe neurological disorders, paralysis, and even death. Thing is, they kinda forgot to mention this to the 46 million people that were forced to take the shot.

The above CBS 60 minutes film was broadcast once in 1976, and then never seen again. Until now, when it has ben unearthed. It’s quite satisfying to watch the former head of the CDC squirming when he denies ever being told of the risks, only to then be confronted with one of his staffers stating “well, actually, you knew because I told you so.” Fucker.

So, when the government tells you that you must take the shot to stave off the risk of death, make your own decision. But remember this and my earlier posts. And don’t think for one minute that your government isn’t capable of putting your life at risk by feeding you with propaganda and not quite giving you the full picture.

Me? I think I’ll pass and take my chances.

Facebook readers click here for the video.

So, it’s E3 time. Sony, Microsoft and Nintendo square up against each other to wow us with what is to come. In reality of course, it’s simply a big dick-waving session. But we win in the end.

Today sees Microsoft’s press briefing. Microsoft always try to make a big splash, and from what they have shown today they have done a pretty damn good job. It’s hard to imagine how Sony can better this. And Nintendo? Well, there’s no real point them turning up.

What did they announce? Find out after the jump!

First off: games. Some new stuff shown, some stuff we expected.

• The Beatles: Rock Band demoed, with Yoko Ono, Olivia Harrison, Ringo Starr and Paul McCartney coming on stage.
• Demonstration of Tony Hawk: Ride and how the skateboard peripheral works
• There is apparently a Modern Warfare 2 game coming out, who’da thunk it? With two DLC map packs hitting the 360 first
• Final Fantasty XIII may be around spring 2010 time
• Epic showed off a 3D side scrolling platform-adventure type game called Shadow Complex coming to Xbox Live Arcade. By all accounts in a similar vein to BC: Rearmed
• Joy Ride – an avatar-based racing game, cartoony-style
• Crackdown 2 announced
• Left4Dead 2 trailer
• Splinter Cell Conviction shown, apparently due this autumn “exclusively” on Xbox
• Forza 3 this October
• Halo 3: ODST gameplay shown
• Halo: Reach announced, trailer shown. Takes place in the period before Halo: Combat Evolved. Follows the story in book? Not known. But Halo 3: ODST buyers will get a key for the beta. Game due 2010.
• Alan Wake FINALLY has a release window: Spring 2010

 Okay, that’s the main games. What else?

Microsoft will be providing real-time music on Xbox Live in partnership with Last FM. Not clear if this is U.S. only (I have never heard of Last FM). Will be free for gold subscribers, coming later this year.

You will be able to queue Netflix movies from within Xbox Live (if you live in the U.S, obviously) and will soon be able to just hit ‘play’.

Microsoft are partnering with Sky in Europe, to allow integration of live TV through the 360, no hardware required, a first in the console industry.

Zune video will launch and offer up to 1080p video playable instantly. Not clear if this is U.S. only or not.

Facebook AND twitter will be integrated into yor Xbox dashboard this autumn. Not sure how I feel about this one! Screenshots can be posted to facebook real-time, and you can see Live and facebook friends all at the same time. With my facebook friends list, that’s going to be a fucking nightmare. Facebook friends who are also on Xbox Live appear with their avatars.

Then a big announcement ( I left it till now to maintain the flow): Hideo Kojima comes on stage and announces Metal Gear is coming to Xbox with a new game: Metal Gear Solid Rising, and all-new instalment in the franchise which seems to focus around Raiden, not Snake. It is not *explicity* stated if this is Xbox exclusive or not.

Then finally the biggest of the big announcements: confirmation of the new motion controller system, codenamed Project Natal. As the leaks suggested a few weeks ago, the camera-like device sits in front of your TV. But unlike the Wii detector bar thing, this is a camera and detects fulll body motion without the need for any controller.

And not just that, it also detects voice, and Microsoft say it can identify the user by the voice.

And not just that, it can supposedly make out facial expressions and identify you by face.

Several silly Wii-like applications are demonstrated – the player’s movement animated the avatar in slinging paint at a large canvas, two women try on virtual clothes, players “press” the buzzer in 1 Vs. 100. Steven Spielberg takes the stage and discusses it as the future. Ho-um me-too stuff so far.

Natal developer Kudo Tsunoda takes the stage in sunglasses, the Natal camera recognises him and signs his profile into Xbox Live and the console. He then proceeds to navigate the Xbox dashboard with his hands, ‘Minority Report’ style.

These all seem ok but nothing too fancy, But then the last set of demonstrations are the real show-stealer.

A virtual character called Milo appears on screen. A female demonstrator stands on stage. Milo walks closer to the screen, looks at the woman and starts to talk to her. She talks back. They interact, Milo seems to respond to her voice and facial expressions. He throws her some goggles; she reaches out to catch them. There is a pond on the screen; the woman leans in and sees her own reflection, and waves her hand to create virtual ripples, the pond reacting to her hand motions. Finally, she draws a picture on a piece of paper, shows it to Milo and “passes” it to him – he picks up the paper and there on screen is a virtual piece of paper with her drawing on it.

Fuck me. Imagine that shit in Fallout 3? I could finaly pet Dogmeat!

Peter Molyneux states that this works, now.

All I can say is….I have no idea how Sony are going to come even close to all that at all. Microsoft said they would re-invent how you play games and the role the console plays in the home, and they weren’t kidding. More than all the other announcements, if the Natal system – whenever it comes out – is anywhere near as complex and accomplished as this tech demo, then wow, we are in for one hell of a ride.

I’ll post the Sony and Nintendo conferences too, when they happen.

Out.